Sunday, July 23, 2006

hand in the door

So I'm getting off the T the other day, and got in the way of a fellow trying to dive in the train. I'm leaned forward and my mind is on tackling the stairs to the street, and I see the crestfallen expression on the dude's face. The trains are somewhat mysterious here. There's no schedule posted anywhere near the platform, and no warning that a train is coming or leaving. Just a sort of rhythm that you get the hang of after a while. It's about 10:30 at night and I see his crestfallen expression. So I did the thing that people do on the elevator: reached back and stuck my hand in the doorway. The doors give my wrist a two-sided karate chop--hiYAH!

I grimace in pain and shake out my hand, force a smile to smooth the stranger's suddenly worried brow, and continue onto the platform. To my right, I see a harried commuter who had rushed toward another doorway, but missed it by a half second or two. Shoulders slumped, she meandered down the walk. The whole exchange was a 2-second interaction.

On my walk home, I notice that the karate chop broke the skin. Not a lot, but enough to make me wonder how it will feel the next day. And I wonder: if our roles had been reversed, would a stranger have stuck his hand out for me? In this town where I'm sometimes struck by the impersonality of everyday public interaction, learning terms like "massh0le," "unprovoked niceness," and "unsolicited greeting," would anyone have seen my crestfallen expression and reflexively stuck a hand out for me?

There's no moral or real point to this story, and no pretty bow to tie. But more than not these days, I find myself wearing my managerial hat. "The conversion of the pay systems on the T could certainly be managed better; regular announcements and signage could improve the customer experience significantly, and would be a very cheap solution." "Is the culture here genuinely different than it is where I'm from, or is it my impression alone? What's driving my perception and who can I talk with to get another point of view?" "Is risking my well-being for another person the right thing to do? What risky options are better than others?"

I just got past the halfway mark in my internship, and am getting involved in a really cool collaborative process. Still working on practicing new habits, and very much enjoying the process and time to reflect on how I'm experiencing my internship. A good friend came up to visit me this weekend, and we had a great time not restraining each other from the guilty pleasure we share in common. So my pockets are a little lighter now, but I finally stocked up on an emergency supply of correspondence cards and foldover notes. I packed quick and light for my trip to the East Coast, and stationery didn't make the cut. And after 15 years of knowing him, I found out that he is my Starburst counterpart (he likes the 2 flavors in the standard pack that I do not like, and vice versa).

In other news, I'm doing a really cool volunteer project with one of our portfolio agencies, and get to visit a place called Troy, NY at the end of this week. And the weekend after that, L is coming out for our 4 year anniversary. He has been going pretty hard at work lately and my IT infrastructure is not the best here in my apartment, so we haven't had a lot of chances to talk without the call dropping. The timing is great because he will have just returned from a vacation to Asia, so he'll have lots of photos and adventures to share. Can't hardly wait.